Have you ever gone through a difficult time in your life? A period when you felt helpless and powerless to deal with your circumstances and destiny? We all have.

Many of us have experienced the tragedy of abusive childhoods, broken relationships or the loss of a loved one. The easiest thing to do in times like these is to blame other people or circumstances for your life, your state of mind, your finances and career.

It's so easy to blame an abusive parent for the way you are today, or a broken relationship for destroying your ability to love again. But blame is a very disempowering emotion.

It places on others the responsibility for your life, your emotions, your self. It disempowers you because you cannot change people or circumstances. The only thing you can change is yourself and the way you react to them.

Some people go through their lives blaming others, living in hopelessness and despair. But, with the exception of child abuse or losing someone you love, no one can do anything to you that you do not give them the permission to do.

By choosing to let things happen they way they do, you are as much to blame for the consequences. It takes a lot of courage to accept that you're the way you are because of the choices you made. But it can be very empowering indeed.

The simple act of taking responsibility for your self and your life is the first step towards picking up the pieces and moving on. When you shift the onus of change to yourself, the constraints of the past are lifted and you can be anything you choose to be.

True empowerment is not about taking control, passing laws, fighting injustice or changing the world. Empowerment starts from within. It comes from your willingness to be responsible for what is happening to you, your life and your world.

At some point in our lives we all face adversity. Some of us blame others, while others own responsibility and get on with their lives.

The way we deal with our pain and let it transform us makes the difference between winning and losing the battle. When you realise that and act on it, you are truly the master of your own destiny.